


Wind beneath my wings

by ShippingFangirl26



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Phandom Fic Fests: Bingo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-12
Updated: 2018-10-12
Packaged: 2019-08-01 02:41:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16276295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShippingFangirl26/pseuds/ShippingFangirl26
Summary: Phil thinks about how far Dan and him have come during the Boncas.





	Wind beneath my wings

**Author's Note:**

> My angel [SuccubusPhan](https://succubusphan.tumblr.com/) asked me what made me happy, and when I answered dnp she wanted me to write something about the dnp moment that made me the most happy - so this came to life. As always, the biggest thank you goes out to her! Written for the prompt Boncas of the Phandom FicFest Bingo.

Phil honestly couldn't believe this was happening. Not to him. Not really. This,  _ everything _ , was just too much to grasp, nothing about this made any sense at all to him - even though he'd had time to come to terms with it. 

 

In reality, the problem was not the concept of the award itself -  _ British Online Creator Awards _ , the name was kind of self explanatory - but the concept of him being there. 

The concept of him and Dan being there, together.

 

Especially that.

 

When he had started… Phil honestly had never thought it would go anywhere. Not by a long shot. He had fun with it, obviously, but he didn’t plan on it getting so out of hand.

 

But then Dan happened.

 

There had been a boy messaging him on twitter, and he had noticed him and replied, they had struck up a conversation - and suddenly the boy was skyping him, being all cute and adorable with his dimples -  _ dimples! _ \- and Phil had felt himself falling, slowly but surely. 

 

But at the time, there hadn't been anything tangible, anything  _ possible _ until the boy had broken up with his girlfriend. Suddenly, he had been assaulted by this constant thought of  _ What if _ , of an opportunity of them _ together _ opening up in the most convenient of ways, and Phil's mind was left to wander. 

 

It had only evolved into something entirely real when he had greeted Phil on the Manchester Train Station, luggage in hand, dimple on his cheek, and he had been able to reach out and touch him and assure himself that the person he had been skyping with for months was, in fact, a real boy by the name Dan Howell.

 

From there on things had skyrocketed. The first time they had kissed was when he really, honestly got the feeling that this could be more than just a rather foolish crush, that this could actually lead somewhere. The thought of a future together had crossed his mind and halted his breath. Did he really want to think that far ahead? That fleeting thought had been solely based on emotions - the thought of money or fame or  _ profit _ overall hadn’t even briefly crossed his mind.

 

He'd never expected them to get as close - not only relationship-wise but also as a respected and beloved working partnership. It was insane. 

 

There was the first Pinof, youtube gatherings, sneaky visits and him moving to Manchester and Dan moving there too, and suddenly they were living together, making money from their videos, their first radio show, the actual realization that they could live from this. 

 

Then, they had taken that huge leap of moving to London. And somehow, it had paid off. 

Now, years later, this was their life, their career; youtube and a dedicated Fanbase and something close to  _ fame _ \- and everything had been with Dan. Maybe even because of him. It was a thrilling thought, somehow. 

 

Everything had led them here, to this very moment, Phil mused when they took their seats for the actual ceremony. He was completely calm. Because, honestly, this was already enough for him. He didn't even particularly care for wining, because he felt like a winner already, with an amazing life and his amazing career and his amazing boyfriend of seven years, now.

 

The recognition of not only being invited here, but being nominated too, was already more than he could've ever asked for. He didn't need the actual award.

 

When  _ Collab of the Year _ got called he was still a bastion of calm. Dan too, surprisingly didn't seem to be fazed at all, even though they hadn't taken home any of the awards they had been nominated for so far.

 

Neither of them had really expected to win any awards, but he knew that Dan had especially toyed with the idea of that type of recognition. It didn't  _ really _ matter, but it would be nice to win, especially for a video like PINOF - something that really represented him and Dan and their relationship. 

 

Getting up and accepting the award went by in a haze. He was happy Dan came up to join him on stage after being called, and that he assumed the responsibility of saying something,  _ anything _ . 

 

Phil wasn’t particularly nervous, but the award, the people, the rush - it made his head spin. Yet, Dan noticed and took over immediately. He could easily rely on his boyfriend when he needed to, and that sent a warm shiver down his spine.

  
  


They shared a look when TATINOF and the accompanying documentary got shown in the nominations for  _ Best Film of the Year _ . This had been their… everything, really, for so long, and it meant so much to them. But they didn’t really need this award to prove that what they had accomplished was monumental. They would be delighted, truly, if they won, but it was not like that was an actual, real possibility - but it was. 

 

They won. 

 

Up on stage, accepting the award, Dan was still calm. This time, Phil could feel the nervousness creeping in, faster than anticipated, more from the whole atmosphere than anything else. They did it. Was this real?

 

When he locked eyes with Dan up on stage he could feel the grip on his composure slip, could feel himself gazing at Dan like he had hung the moon and the sun and the stars, so he didn’t dare to look at him again, afraid he’d do something that he would surely come to regret later. 

 

Then, it was the time for  _ British Creator of the Year _ . Both him and Dan were nominated, and he was aware that their audience had voted for them in large amounts, but he wasn’t really expecting anything - not against the others, and most importantly, not against his boyfriend. Dan was obviously quite nervous this time. His sparkly silver suit twinkled when he moved - and it twinkled a lot. 

 

Phil didn’t really know why. They had talked about it before the award, and Dan had assured him time and time again that he didn’t want the award - then why was he so nervous now?

 

He was shocked when his name got called. He got up and Dan looked at him with eyes so bright they weren’t brown anymore - they were golden. That’s when he recognized the look.  _ Pride _ .   
  


Dan was proud of him.   
  


He hadn’t been nervous for himself. He had been nervous for  _ Phil _ .

 

His heart soared in his chest as he went up to receive the award. Maybe  _ he _ had been the one to win, but he wouldn’t even  _ be _ here without Dan.

 

The choice he made wasn’t a hard one. 

 

He knew he wanted to share this moment with Dan - his best friend, his partner, his boyfriend -  _ Dan _ . So he did. 

 

He called him up on stage, and they joked about going apart further than a few meters, and he knew the phandom would eat this right up - but he didn't care. When Dan smiled at him like this he  _ couldn’t _ care, even if he wanted to; so bright, all pride and adoration and  _ love _ . 

 

He felt so  _ complete _ he was sure his heart would fly right out of his chest and he literally trembled on his way down the stage. When Dan called his name again he turned, showed his award to the screaming crowd again, and waited for his boyfriend to catch up with him. 

 

He really wanted to lean into him in this moment, to kiss him; but he knew this wasn’t the right time. So he kept it in, they would be able to enjoy it in private - it was one of these moments that he wanted to share with no one else but Dan. Instead, they shared a knowing look, and Phil was pretty sure he had never felt happier than he did in this single moment.

**Author's Note:**

> You can also [follow me on tumblr](http://shippingfangirl26.tumblr.com) or  
> [reblog this fic on tumblr!](http://shippingfangirl26.tumblr.com/post/178987203146/wind-beneath-my-wings)
> 
> Comments and kudos would be highly appreciated! <3


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